16. Gratitude Sixteen: the people in my life

Today I am grateful for the people in my life who hold up a mirror to me, and let me see myself through their eyes. Sometimes I believe I would shrink down to the size of a tadpole and simply ... fade away. Because the voice in my head -- my own voice -- only ever remembers how lousy I am. Today I am grateful for the people who remind me I am capable and strong and interesting. Someday I will reach a point where I can say that to myself. But until then, I am grateful for the people in my life.

15. Gratitude fifteen: Someone who believes in me

I have one person who believes in me: Me. I am grateful to believe in myself. I don't believe that I am amazing. I don't believe that I am great. I don't believe I am the best. What I believe is that I can try my ultimate best and keep on trying again and again. No matter how many times I fall or fail, I will pick myself up again and try again. I will never give up. I will always keep going. I believe that I can make it because I will never give up and I will always keep trying. I believe I can can learn from my errors and learn from my failures. I believe this is a great gift, and I am lucky to be someone who can keep trying. I am very grateful to believe in myself.

14. Gratitude Fourteen: resources

Today I am incredibly grateful for the resources at my disposal. I was able to tape myself acting using my video camera, and then watch it on my computer. I was able to work on my story on my iPad. I was able to whip up an amazing batch of vegan brownies. I was able to drive to my audition. All these things I have make my life easier, richer, more interesting, and possible. I am truly and amazingly grateful that I have resources like this at my disposal. A car, a camera, a computer, an iPad, a kitchen, a pantry. I am grateful.

13. Gratitude Thirteen: acknowledgement

Today I am grateful for acknowledgement. When my hard work produces results that other people recognize and appreciate, I am grateful. Sometimes it's like trying to grow in a vacuum. So to get feedback and criticism whether it's always what you want to hear is amazing. So I am truly grateful to anyone who offers feedback and acknowledgement. It may not always be exactly what I want to hear. But that is a different story.

12. Gratitude Twelve: Not looking a gift horse in the eye

Today I am off to Hamilton to act in a part I got cast for just based on a photo of me. I am grateful for the work, regardless of the fact that I did not exactly earn it. Work gotten by excellent auditioning is in a way more 'confidence' boosting. At the same time, however, I am so grateful anytime anyone is willing to count on me to tell their story. I am so grateful. So, instead of feeling like I don't deserve it because I didn't earn it, I will be grateful and gracious and patient and glad. I am so grateful to do work that is in my field and that I get paid to do.

11. Gratitude eleven: The Rain

It's nearly impossible to keep warm today outside. The wind is strong and the rain is coming down in torrents. Chilly. Very very chilly. I am grateful for the rain because it means the winter is done. I am grateful for the rain because it washes away the dirt and debris that appeared once the snow began to melt. I am grateful for the rain because it will nurture the earth and help grow the gardens.

Today, I thank the rain. Thank you, rain. I am grateful.

10. Gratitude ten: my child

I am unendingly grateful for my child, above and beyond the whole 'family' thing. It is because of my child that I am able to go back and have mercy and compassion for the child I was. My child has enabled me to forgive the mistakes I made as a mixed up and lost young person. My child has taught me that I can let go the past and breathe.

I am grateful for my child and all that he has taught me.

9. Gratitude nine: patience

I am grateful for patience. Patience is something I struggle with. I struggle to calm my mind and my spirit heart as ambition and anxiety and grief rage against my lack of productivity, kicking me in the throat and leaving me breathless and broken. I am grateful for patience as I navigate, day after day, this world and all that I am and all that I do. I am grateful for patience.